Source: https://www.jjwxc.net/onebook.php?novelid=4738582

This translation is originally posted on  love4baihe.blogspot.complease read it there. and check out other stories too  

C/T Warning: Bai Lu, skip past the red line if you don't want to read about her, green line is the end of her part. (Putting a red line because can come off too suggestive imo)

_____

Vetiver iris is intoxicating. Cheng Suran's limbs grew weak, completely unable to resist, only able to passively endure.

The lights came on again.

"Ranran..." Jiang Yu leaned back a little, afraid that she might not be breathing well.

Cheng Suran opened her eyes.

A warm yellow light streamed down from above, splendid and dazzling, resembling crystal. Her head buzzed, and past images surged before her eyes... always so passive, so powerless.

Jiang Yu bowed her head to kiss her again.

"No way!" Cheng Suran pushed with both hands against her shoulders, trying to push her away. "You used to be like this."

Luxurious suite, beautiful crystal lamp, a cold and ruthless benefactor, a well-behaved and weak canary. The memory was deeply rooted in her heart, she was a little dissatisfied, and thoughts that had been brewing many years ago flashed in her mind...

But Jiang Yu misunderstood, recalling the past, and dared not make any further moves.

Suddenly, Cheng Suran rolled over and embraced her, reversing from the bottom to the top position—imitating her.

Jiang Yu was dumbfounded.

As if sensing the woman's intentions, she subconsciously wanted to push away, but Cheng Suran held her hand.

"Ranran?" There was a trace of panic in her voice.

Cheng Suran pecked her lips and traced along her finely carved contours.

"You are allowed to bully me, but I am not allowed to bully you?"

"..."

"Only a benefactor will not allow it."

Jiang Yu choked up and couldn't speak.

The woman's soft voice rang in her ear: "Sister, I want to drink hot cocoa."

Jiang Yu instantly understood what she meant.

She turned her head, buried her face in the quilt, imagining the scenes that made her nervous and frightened. Today is Ranran's birthday, and she doesn't want to refuse.

"Is it okay? Elder sister?" Cheng Suran deliberately teased her.

Jiang Yu took a deep breath.

She should be able to get over it.

And she hoped to belong entirely to Ranran.

"Okay..."

Cheng Suran was delighted, and wanted to pull down the quilt, but Jiang Yu held on tightly, and said eagerly, "Turn off the light."

"Why?"

"Just turn them off." She said with a pleading tone.

Cheng Suran was startled, her intuition was telling her that it might not be that simple. Seeing Jiang Yu as if she was having trouble facing something, her heart suddenly ached.

She turned off the ceiling light, plunging the room into darkness. She could faintly sense Jiang Yu relaxing a bit, so she gently stroked her hair.

"Jiang Coco, I'm here." She remembered that Jiang Yu was afraid of the dark.

Jiang Yu slowly pulled down the quilt, in the darkness, she could only see Cheng Suran's blurry outline, but she could truly feel her breath. "Ranran..."

"Mm."

Cheng Suran's nose felt sore. If she could, she really wanted to see her.

Her eyes gradually adjusted to the darkness, allowing her to see a bit more clearly. The outdoor light seeped through the curtains, casting a dim, hazy glow, making the room feel like the quiet depths of the ocean.

....

Both were exhausted.

Although Cheng Suran has never eaten pork, she has seen pigs running, so she learned from them. She tidied up the mess and returned to the bed. Jiang Yu lay on her side, with her back to Cheng Suran, curled up, breathing calmly and deeply.

Cheng Suran hugged Jiang Yu from behind. "Sister?"

Feeling the trembling of the person in her arms, Cheng Suran was sure that she was not asleep, and a faint intuition arose within her again. She reached out her fingertips, gently gliding over Jiang Yu's cheek. "Can you tell me why you wanted to turn off the lights?"

Jiang Yu caught her hand and kissed it near her lips.

"Sorry."

"Why are you apologizing again?"

"It's my psychological issue, it's not your fault." Her voice was muffled and somewhat downcast.

Since a very young age, Jiang Yu knew that her gender was a sin. As she grew older, she also realized that her height and appearance, which contradicted mainstream beauty standards, were also sins.

Because she was a girl, she was cast aside and cursed by her family, and because she was taller than her peers, with a big frame, and withdrawn, she was discriminated against and excluded by her classmates. From head to toe, from the inside out, most of what she got was belittlement and humiliation.

Later, she gradually accepted her "ugliness", bulkiness and roughness.

During the first two years of her career, the glamorous fashion circle was full of discrimination, body shaming was ubiquitous, and sometimes even skin color felt like a sin. Models were subjected to "PUA" tactics*, and even those who were tall and weighed just over 90 pounds were maliciously mocked as "fat pigs." It took her a long time to build real self-confidence.

*Pick-up artist tactics: to be brainwashed/deceived

But the seeds of self-loathing have taken root.

The closer someone was, the more they cared about her, the harder it was for her to relax and display the same openness and confidence in front of them as she did on the runway or in front of the camera.

Her ex-girlfriend was different.

She had once loved her deeply.

She was used to being proactive, used to being in control, and being passive meant being controlled, subject to mockery and manipulation. Because of love, because of caring, she couldn't bear the possibility of her lover showing any hint of disgust, even though this so-called disgust only existed in her imagination.

Her ex-girlfriend shattered her self-esteem, like prying open a stubborn clamshell.

It took her a long time to rebuild herself again.

But today...

Cheng Suran listened quietly, her thoughts turbulent, as if an invisible hand were squeezing her heart, making it hard to breathe. "Jiang Yu... you don't have to try so hard, you don't have to be perfect, you don't have to be valuable, I will love you regardless." She hugged her and whispered in her ear:

"I just love you, no matter what you look like."

Jiang Yu frowned slightly, and salty tears welled up from the corners of her eyes. She turned around and faced Cheng Suran across the darkness.

Finally took that step today.

"Ranran…"

"Why?"

"Thank you."

The two seemed to have a tacit understanding, and they held each other's hands at the same time.

Cheng Suran sealed Jiang Yu's mouth with a kiss.

....

The next day, the sun rose higher in the sky.

Jiang Yu had a dream, dreaming that she was lying and rolling in the soft cotton pile, it was hot and fragrant, she couldn't help snuggling and rubbing, and slowly opening her eyes.

In front of her was pajamas with a rabbit pattern, rising and falling with the rhythm of breathing. Her lips were nestled against a strand of hair.

She was lying in Cheng Suran's arms.

Ranran was sleeping soundly, a natural curve forming at the corner of her lips, her skin radiant and fair as cream. Jiang Yu couldn't resist leaning over and giving her a kiss.

The scene of last night suddenly flashed through her mind.

“...”

She closed her eyes, inexplicably feeling a little ashamed, she was so much older than Ranran, her height also had an advantage, her temperament was not soft, and she actually—

For a moment, she found it a bit hard to accept, so she quietly turned over, lifted the covers, and tried to get up.

Her pajamas were still on the carpet.

Suddenly, an arm hooked her waist. With a little force, a woman's low voice came from behind: "Where are you going?"

The next second she was pushed back.

"You want to slip away after kissing me early in the morning?" Cheng Suran chuckled, pulling her back into her embrace and pressing up against her from behind.

Jiang Yu lay still on her side, her face half covered by her hair.

No expression.

"Sister..." Cheng Suran called her softly, "You know, I've been waiting for this day for a very long time, I've always wanted it, always."

Hearing Cheng Suran address her as "sister" made Jiang Yu's heart tremble. "What?"

"To see you when I wake up, and to hug you when I reach out." Cheng Suran closed her eyes and sniffed her hair, "and...finally it's not a dream."

Ripples spread through Jiang Yu's heart.

After a long silence, she grasped that hand, slowly turned to face Cheng Suran, and they locked eyes. That face was clearly reflected in her gaze.

They stared at each other silently.

A ray of sunlight came in through the cracks in the curtain and fell on the head of the bed. The room was dimly lit, filled with a subtle blend of fragrances, like a sanctuary for the two of them, a place of tenderness.

Jiang Yu caressed Cheng Suran's face: "From now on, every day will be like this, will you get tired from this one day?"

"I will."

“...”

"By that time, we should be too old to walk, right? Ninety years old, or a hundred years old? Hahahaha - Cheng Suran giggled, the dimples on her cheeks sinking gently.

Jiang Yu also smiled, and the corners of her eyes were slightly moist.

"Ranran…"

"Hmm?"

"In your heart...do you still care about the past?" She thought of Cheng Suran's resistance last night, and felt a little uneasy.

Cheng Suran's smile faltered, a little helpless, and suddenly she wanted to tease her, and said solemnly: "I do." 

Jiang Yu held her breath.

"So, you need to let me win a few more times."

"?"

"Let me do it a few more times to get used to the current life, then I won't mind anymore." Cheng Suran smiled slyly.

Jiang Yu remembering last night again: "..."

She had a feeling she was being played.

Cheng Suran came close to her ear and said in a low voice: "Sister, do you know what hot cocoa tastes like?" After saying that, she quickly rolled over and climbed down from the other side of the bed.

"Hot…"

Jiang Yu was momentarily puzzled, then quickly realized, grabbing the nearby pillow and throwing it at her.

Cheng Suran dodges away.

Didn't hit.

She picked up the pillow and threw it back, hitting Jiang Yu in the face laughing happily: "Hahaha..."

"Cheng Suran, you wait."

"I'm looking forward to my next hot cocoa!"

Cheng Suran picked up the pillow and chased after her.

There is no work this weekend, and the two of them tossed and fussed in the room for a while, preparing to wash up. Jiang Yu suddenly received a call from her assistant, who said that Jiang Zhijun had "revealed" her family affairs on Weibo in the past two days, accusing her of not supporting her mother and refusing to pay for her mother's medical treatment, which led to the tragic death of the old woman.

"The people in Sister Pei's studio have already monitored it and cleaned it up. There is no public opinion fermenting on the Internet, but this morning he actually distributed leaflets at the entrance of the company...

The little assistant couldn't help laughing while talking.

Jiang Yu also smiled, but her eyes were cold: "If he insists on going in and squatting for a longer time, let him continue posting. Do you understand what needs to be done?"

"Hmm, don't worry."

After hanging up the phone, Cheng Suran hugged her and asked, "What's wrong? Who's squatting?"

Jiang Yu rubbed the center of her brows and recounted what happened.

"Pfft hahahaha--"

Cheng Suran let out a burst of laughter, and her voice broke: "Could it be because I smashed his head last time? What's he thinking? How many people work at the company on a big weekend like this?"

Jiang Yu just sighed, with a tired look on her face.

She was really exhausted by these things.

"Even if Jiang Zhijun shakes these things out, I don't care. How others see me has nothing to do with me. I don't need to explain or prove anything to anyone, but I will definitely send him a luxurious prison tour feast."

Hearing what she said, Cheng Suran suddenly remembered the negative public opinion against Jiang Yu on the Internet a few years ago, and also remembered that she was so foolish as to charge forward, and even exposed her desire to find out the truth in front of Jiang Yu…

It was only now that she recalled it. At that time, Jiang Yu must have been very disappointed.

How she wished she could believe her.

"Coco, tell me, have...have they treated you badly before?"

She vaguely guessed, just like Jiang Yu easily guessed her family environment back then.

"Just like my aunt?"

Jiang Yu's eyes were lowered, as if avoiding her gaze, she gave a soft "hmm". Just when Cheng Suran thought she didn't want to continue, she raised her eyes again, took a deep breath, and slowly exhaled: "You know my original name is Jiang Wanyin..."

She started with her name.

Her voice was a bit lazy, and it sounded like she was telling someone else's story. From birth to growing up, from escaping to retirement, the little things that happened in tens of thousands of days and nights have already flashed back and forth in her mind many times.

She was probably really numb.

But to another person, none of this is imaginable.

When Cheng Suran heard the part about the college entrance examination, her body couldn't help shaking, and the surging anger overwhelmed her reason, and she shouted: "Why did she?! Why..."

She deeply understood that the college entrance exam was the only opportunity for her and Jiang Yu, who were penniless and isolated at that time, to start anew. She had almost been sent to a vocational school by her aunt and had knelt all night to escape that fate. But Jiang Yu didn't have the same stroke of luck in those tight spots, losing her chance just like that.

That kind of hatred, that kind of unwillingness...

If it were her, she would go down with them, even if it meant going to hell together.

The rapid breathing was accompanied by the intense heaving of the chest, Cheng Suran looked at the expressionless Jiang Yu, her heart felt like being twisted by a knife, and her eyes turned red.

That's why when she asked about her graduation school, she didn't answer. That's why she would fearfully pass out in a dark room. That's why she worked tirelessly to climb the ladder and abandoned love, which she didn't understand in the first place but still longed for it deep inside.

She is such a person who grew up in the dark and traveled all over the thorny forest, even though she was once full of hostility, she still left a place of softness in her heart, and all the remaining precious softness was given to her.

Although clumsy and childish at times.

Recalling that Jiang Yu once asked her if she was bad, she replied, 'Not bad at all.' In her heart, there was more "good" than any so-called "bad."

[So in my heart, you are not bad at all.]

[You are a good sister. ]

"And after?"

"After.. " Jiang Yu paused slightly.

Later, she came to Jiangcheng to work, serving dishes in a restaurant, and an assembly line in a factory, feeling lost every day. If she hadn't accidentally seen the advertising for a modeling contest and thought of the 3,000 yuan prize, she might still be struggling, worrying about her next meal.

The modeling circle is not easy to break into, those with superior conditions, those with rich families, and those with professional backgrounds, all of them are better than her. It's just that some people give up halfway, some people become trapped in comfort and happiness, and there are fewer and fewer people walking along the way.

And she was lucky to meet a noble man.

Talking about her career, Jiang Yu gained confidence, and her eyes shimmered. She cupped Cheng Suran's face and smiled, saying, "It's okay, I've let it go."

The calmer she was, the more Cheng Suran could feel the bone-eroding pain.

Tears immediately fell.

"Do you remember that before, you encouraged me and told me to keep going forward, don't look back... We are the same, your unspeakable pain is also my shameful wound. Now I also tell you, keep going , don't look back, I'll be with you." She suppressed the trembling in her voice.

"In front of me, you can cry when you want, laugh when you want, you are what you are, you don't need to pretend."

Jiang Yu lowered her head and kissed her forehead, and slowly wiped her face with her thumb: "Mm, I know, don't cry."

The air seemed to stop flowing, frozen at this moment, quiet and warm, like returning to a childhood dream, hoping for a future where this could become a reality.

And then the dream came true.

....

Source: https://www.jjwxc.net/onebook.php?novelid=4738582

This translation is originally posted on  love4baihe.blogspot.com please read it there. and check out other stories too 

Around the time of the Qingming Festival, the weather gradually became warmer.

The lawsuit between the company and Bai Lu entered the trial stage. The court ordered Bai Lu to pay liquidated damages according to the terms of the contract. Unconvinced, Bai Lu chose to appeal.

No company, no agent, means no team, this lawsuit is full of turmoil, Bai Lu has been in hot searches many times, passers-by have gone from eating melons to being disgusted, and because she is entangled in lawsuits, without a team, she is exhausted. Due to the legal troubles and the lack of a team, she had not worked for a long time.

She was absent from the fall/winter fashion season in February and March.

Since the beginning of the year, no magazine has invited her, and the frequency of her attendance at various events has plummeted.

At present, only the endorsement brand is supporting her, but it is only because the contract is still in place. Now in her situation, the brand can terminate the contract at any time and ask for compensation.

Under heavy pressure, Bai Lu lost control of herself, overeating every day, lying on the bed decadently, and gained fifteen catties in a month.

Her body and appearance were out of shape.

The brands quickly requested to terminate her contracts.

_____________________________________________

Within two days, the entry "Bai Lu attempted suicide" was on the top of the list. She burned charcoal at home, but her assistant found her and sent her to the hospital. Fortunately, her life was not in danger.

Cheng Suran has been paying attention to this matter.

After a few days of commotion on the Internet, the people who eat melons don't know the truth. Cheng Suran learned about the developments from Jiang Yu, but Jiang Yu is indifferent to all this and is only waiting for the second trial.

"It's the same old trick."

"It's not the first time for her to burn charcoal. She inhales some carbon monoxide and then goes to the hospital for high-pressure oxygen, claiming she had a near-death experience, making it a public spectacle. Those who genuinely want to end their lives do it silently without anyone knowing. With the effort she puts into her theatrics, who knows how many times she's done this?"

"However, I don't want her to die. Who will compensate me if she dies?"

Jiang Yu spoke calmly.

She can be kind to a person a thousand times and a thousand times, but if her heart turns cold, she can be a thousand times more ruthless. Cheng Suran thinks the same.

Initially, when she heard that Bai Lu had attempted suicide due to excessive stress, Cheng Suran had a faint trace of compassion for a person's life. However, thinking about how her dearest one had been severely harmed by Bai Lu, both mentally and materially, that hint of compassion vanished into thin air.

_____________________________________________

....

Lately, the company has been collaborating with universities on a new project, keeping Cheng Suran extremely busy. Besides her personal work schedule, she and Wen Ruoxian have had to work late at the office, often not returning home to have a proper meal with Jiang Yu.

Finally, by the end of the month, the project reached a certain stage, and they no longer had to work overtime.

She and Jiang Yu agreed to go home on time for dinner today.

Coming out of the conference room, Cheng Suran walked quickly, and returned to the office, impatient to pack her things. "Remember to send the electronic version of this document to Mr. Lin tomorrow."

"Okay."

Holding the laptop, Xiao Meng glanced at her upper body, and couldn't help but ask: "Miss Cheng, where did you buy this dress? I think it's pretty, is there any other color? I want to buy one too."

Cheng Suran was taken aback, and looked down at his clothes: "This..."

A light brown embroidered shirt.

It was designed and made for her by Jiang Yu herself. The only one in the world.

She looked at the clothes, the corners of her mouth turned up slightly, and somehow felt a little proud, but it was difficult to show in front of her subordinates, so she just smiled lightly: "This isn't for sale, my wife made it ffor me."

"Whoa—"

Xiao Meng covered her mouth in surprise, showing envy.

On the first day of work after the year, her sharp-eyed colleagues in the company discovered that Miss Cheng was wearing a ring on her left ring finger, so the news spread, and everyone speculated that Miss Cheng if not newly married, something good was about to happen.

No wonder some people felt that Miss Cheng and Miss Wen seemed distant.

So it's "prioritizing love over friends"!

"I'll go back first, you can get off work after you finish tidying up." Cheng Suran picked up her bag, turned and left the office. Her heart had long flown back home.

When the elevator went down to the parking lot, her phone rang. She looked down as she walked out. It was a local number, which looked familiar, but she couldn't remember where she had seen it before.

"Hello."

"Miss Cheng, I'm Tian Lin." A female voice familiar from many years ago came from the phone, with a slightly anxious tone.

Cheng Suran suddenly realized: "Sister Tian Lin? Oh, it's me, what's the matter?"

"Please come to the First Affiliated Hospital quickly, Sister Yu has an accident!"