****
Because Jae-yeon asked if they don't wear couple pajamas even though they're newlyweds, she lied and said they wear couple pajamas every night and sleep.
Jae-hee awkwardly wore pink pajamas. Yoo-jin also took blue pajamas and went inside, so she'd probably come out wearing them. Jae-hee, who ended up wearing couple pajamas without meaning to, kept fixing the clothes awkwardly, then sighed and walked to the short sofa in the bedroom and sat down. The novel "Camellia Flower", which Jae-hee had recommended in passing, was sitting on Yoo-jin's nightstand. Jae-hee reached out, picked it up, and slowly skimmed through the book.
"...we didn't have this at home, right?"
"What are you doing?"
She was startled and closed the book. When Jae-hee lifted her head, she saw Yoo-jin wearing the same pajamas as her. Yoo-jin usually liked to sleep wearing a gown. Jae-hee, who felt endlessly heavy inside, spoke.
"Just wear whatever's comfortable to sleep."
"Still, since Agassi is here."
Somehow that heaviness lingered. Jae-hee nodded and put the book on the
nightstand. She went out to the balcony to get some fresh air for a moment. The cold wind blew. She mulled over a part of the conversation she had with Jae-yeon earlier.
‘That's strange.’
'What is?’
‘A room that fits your taste... why is it only the study?’
‘Ah... anyway, because of research I stay in the study a lot, and Yoo-jin has better taste than me. That’s why.’
‘Mm…’
Jae-yeon was still quick-witted. She had been so nervous, afraid that her guilty feeling might get caught. It felt like walking on a tightrope. Feeling complicated inside, Jae-hee went out to the balcony to get some air.
"It's cold. Why're you outside?"
Yoo-jin followed her out to the balcony, put a thick knit cardigan over Jae-hee's shoulders, and stood next to her.
"No, just..."
"Is it complicated?"
"Mm, yeah."
Without knowing, she put her hand in her pocket, then flinched. Oh right, I quit smoking.
Seeing Jae-hee like that, Yoo-jin sighed. Studying and research never had anything easy. Even when focusing peacefully, research was still hard. But in Korea, you also had to get research funds, take care of the researchers, and keep others happy too.
Seeing Jae-hee, who followed her even though she could study much more comfortably, made Yoo-jin feel sorry. She was amazed at Jae-hee, who quit smoking with superhuman strength because of her, who hated cigarette smell extremely.
"You're very much like Agassi."
"...Really?"
That couldn't be. Jae-hee smiled awkwardly and pulled the knit cardigan tighter around her shoulders.
"That’s why I like her."
"…"
"Though she's a bit more… outgoing than you, she seems like a warm and nice person."
Yoo-jin thought of Jae-yeon, who always chattered excitedly, and smiled softly.
"It's good that you like her."
She looked up at the night sky. In the pitch-black sky where no stars could be seen, only the bright moon was shining. It was cold, but Yoo-jin did not want to leave Jae-hee alone, so she lightly stomped her feet and stayed by Jae-hee’s side.
"...It’s hard, right? You don’t have to match me. You don’t have to act. I hope you don’t push yourself too much because of me."
"It's not acting though."
At Yoo-jin’s words, Jae-hee's heart started to pound fast.
Huh? Not acting?
Without looking at Jae-hee’s face, which clearly showed a flustered expression, Yoo-jin kept her eyes on the night view and spoke.
"Maybe my heart is being fickle because of your devoted feelings."
"..."
"You can call it selfish. I... don’t really know myself. So I don’t really know what this feeling is."
"...No."
"..."
"That’s exactly what I’ve been hoping for."
"...If the tower you built with devotion collapses, won’t your heart hurt even more?"
What an unlucky thing to say.
It was like throwing out a warning in advance that she would push her heart away. Even to herself, it was disgusting.
How must Jae-hee feel, standing before her, who held a selfish heart that she herself could not forgive.
"...I don’t know."
So your heart can waver, while I am betting everything on this clumsy trick to face you.
What could be more important than your heart?
Even if it’s just a brief shake, even if it’s a tower that’ll collapse again, it’s fine.
I live and die by your reaction, your movements, your every expression, so none of that matters.
"Yoo-jin."
"...Mm"
A dam collapses when a very small hole grows bigger.
A huge dam falls helplessly because of a tiny hole.
Jae-hee was sure that Yoo-jin’s dam, as big as the sea, would collapse through the small but precious gap she created.
"I think there’s no right answer in relationships. You and me too, there’s no right answer. Because there’s no fixed answer, maybe the path to reach the answer that makes us happiest will be hard and rough."
“…”
"When faced with a path like that, anxiety rises, fear creeps in, and the urge to run away becomes overwhelming."
So that is how you feel. You are not a saint, how could you always smile? How much have I pushed you? I kept repeating meaningless promises not to hurt you and came this far. How long can I stay by your side as this terrible person? If you run away, I will have nothing left. What should I do?
"...I..."
"Still, I’ll always stay by your side."
Yoo-jin turned her head and looked at Jae-hee.
Jae-hee, still looking up at the night sky, had clear shining eyes.
In Jae-hee’s eyes, which stood up again no matter how much she got hurt, there was a liveliness that Yoo-jin could not find in her own eyes. Maybe she had approached Jae-hee more and more because she admired that, because she wanted to get closer to that liveliness.
"Because there’s no fixed answer, the path we take will be the answer. Even if the process is hard and painful, I won’t leave. I’ll always stay here, by Ha Yoo-jin’s side."
"...I don’t know what to say."
With a silent smile, Jae-hee turned her gaze from the night sky to Yoo-jin. She was finally opening up, even just a little.
At Yoo-jin’s honest words, Jae-hee spread her arms.
"Come."
“…?”
"If you don’t know what to say, then just show it with your actions."
She did not rush her.
Jae-hee only looked at Yoo-jin with loving eyes and smiled warmly.
There were no grand words of comfort.
Even so, strangely, her heart felt at ease.
Yoo-jin carefully stepped forward and fell into her arms.
Her awkward hands wrapped around Jae-hee’s waist, and her stiff neck leaned carefully on her shoulder.
That was enough for Jae-hee.
Her hands, more natural and warmer than Yoo-jin’s, pulled her shoulder gently.
As if they had planned it, their bodies came together.
In the cold night air, their warmth reached each other.
"Let’s go slowly. There’s no need to rush. I’ll always stay by your side. One step. No, even half a step is fine. Little by little... let’s walk our path."
I should say I love you, but why can’t I?
Am I waiting for you to say it to me, like a habit?
"Yoo-jin, I love you."
It feels like I want to hear your voice saying you love me, with pure love and true feelings.
Your overflowing heart reaches mine. This brilliant feeling, which cannot be exchanged for anything, soaks me. I will approach you little by little, very little by little. Jae-hee, when the time comes that I can stand before you, there is something I really want to say. Until then, please wait for me just a little.
****
Normally, Jae-hee and Yoo-jin never prepared breakfast together, but today they welcomed the morning together for the first time.
They jumped out of bed, went into separate bathrooms to wash up, and got ready for work, but still, it was really a "newlywed couple" kind of morning.
Jae-hee stood in the master bedroom’s dressing room, not in the study and not with post-its, but in front of the "real" Yoo-jin, holding a shirt and slacks, and dressed according to her coordination advice.
For Jae-hee, who believed that shirts or blouses must always be tucked fully into pants, it made no sense why the shirt should be half tucked out.
Not knowing anything about the half tuck, Jae-hee just looked at the half-out shirt with an uncomfortable gaze.
But with her lovely wife glaring at her, she did not have the courage to argue her theory and obediently dressed that way.
"Is Mr. Yoon coming?"
"No, I’ll go with my car."
"Then, I’ll drive you."
"...Suit yourself."
Though she spoke carelessly, Jae-hee smiled as she looked at Yoo-jin’s profile with a smile hanging on her face, and headed to the study.
She had to pack the USB and research materials.
Today, Soo-jin wouldn’t be able to leave work on time.
Thanks to Jae-hee, who really assigned a final assignment of translating three volumes of German for the end of the semester, Soo-jin was almost half-dead, focusing on the assignment.
If she gave her more work today, she wouldn’t be able to leave until night.
Even though she whined, saying it’s killing her, or that Jae-hee’s a smart devil, Soo-jin still finished everything in the end.
It was quite fun for Jae-hee to watch her junior grow.
She hummed a tune as she packed the materials into her bag and left the study.
And at that moment, an empty basket slid down from the ceiling.
"What’s this?"
"...Ugh... Unnie..."
"...? Aaah!"
"What’s going on?!"
Yoo-jin came rushing out of the bedroom.
From the second floor, she looked at her sister-in-law, who had her messy hair down and was lowering a long, empty basket with some unknown string, with a dumbfounded face.
Then she looked at her wife, who screamed while falling onto her butt after being shocked by the scene.
"Unnie, are you okay?"
"N-no, I’m not okay! That’s dangerous, what is that?!"
"...Send me some tangerines..."
Finally understanding the situation, Yoo-jin grabbed the few remaining tangerines and approached the basket.
Once the basket was filled and heavy, Jae-yeon pulled it up like fishing.
Jae-hee stared blankly at the basket sliding up.
"Thanks, olke~ Unnie, are you okay?"
Yoo-jin reached her hand toward Jae-hee, who was red-faced and fuming from wounded pride.
Jae-hee turned her head, but seeing Yoo-jin’s blooming smile made her feel even more embarrassed.
"...Let’s meet later, in the afternoon. We have to go house hunting."
"Okay~ got it."
"Go back to sleep, Agassi."
"Okay, olke. Have a good day, both of you~"
Watching the long-haired ghost — no, Jae-yeon — waving her hand and disappearing, Jae-hee puffed her cheeks in dissatisfaction.
Seeing Yoo-jin’s twitching mouth corners made her feel more ashamed.
Flustered, Jae-hee said to Yoo-jin,
"S-stop laughing~"
"I don’t want to."
"Eek!"
Bickering, the two started another noisy day.
****
Flipping through the documents Jae-hee had handed over, Soo-jin let out a sigh.
Jae-hee’s business trip had been scheduled urgently for the academic conference report, and the ones getting dragged into it were Jae-hee and her assigned TA, Soo-jin.
Moreover, since this report had to include S University’s research results, they had no choice but to give it their all.
Compared to her own simple summarizing, she wondered how much tougher it must be for Jae-hee, who had to do the presentation.
Soo-jin, who knew she had it much easier than the other TAs thanks to Jae-hee’s consideration, stopped sighing and opened the document window on her screen.
At that moment, a message notification popped up at the bottom right of the monitor.
[Goddess Yoo-jin: Miss Soo-jin]
Ack, it is the goddess!
Soo-jin quickly minimized the document and opened the chat window.
Since she had become a typing master after working as a personal servant for the professors, typing a thousand characters per minute in Hangul was basic for her. Worried that Yoo-jin might be waiting, she quickly typed a reply.
[Me: Yes, Unnie!]
[Goddess Yoo-jin: Do you like board games?]
[Me: Of course, absolutely!]
[Goddess Yoo-jin: Then, do you want to come to our place after work today? Let’s play together ^^]
[Me: Oh my god, I would love to!!! Absolutely. Call!!!]
What’s happening?! The goddess had invited her to play a game! Soo-jin couldn’t hide her excitement and let out a puff of breath. The administrative assistant, seeing her, asked curiously.
“Miss Soo-jin, is something good happening?”
“Yes! Something very good happened!”
“Just a moment ago, you looked all down because you were sorting Professor Seon’s materials.”
“Ah, I’m going to meet someone important today.”
“Someone important? Oh, are you dating, Miss Soo-jin?”
“Dating? Me? What a ridiculous thing to say, haha.”
Brushing her hair back smoothly, Soo-jin smiled brightly like a sports drink commercial model.
“I’m going to attend a religious activity.”
“Huh?”
“My faith’s deepened these days.”
“...Ah, okay.”
Remembering the notice that had come down from the administration building a few days ago, the administrative assistant quietly stepped back.
[Notice on Measures Regarding Recent Cult Recruitment Activities on Campus
1. Recently, recruitment activities by suspected cults or heretical religions have been taking place on campus, causing inconvenience to members of the university.
2. In cooperation with the security team, any recruitment involving shouting, obstruction of movement on campus, or use of coercion will be considered interference with the right to study and learning environment. As such, violators will be banned from campus and prohibited from engaging in recruitment activities.
3. There have been internal reports that some cults are organizing themselves through clubs. Therefore, department assistants and faculty members are requested to review the activities of their assigned clubs, provide detailed reports in their regular submissions, and offer appropriate guidance. End.]
****